For many people, the very idea that they might not be able to find a partner is one of their most dreadful fears. Many people are afraid of solitude because for them it equals isolation.
However, it is possible to be in a relationship and be lonely. Being lonely in a relationship isn't better than being alone because isolation (from the partner) still exists. If one knows how to arrange his or her life without a partner, being single can be more rewarding than the attempts to put up with the trap of an unhappy relationship.
While sometimes one can't physically survive without a partner to carry him or her through life, in many cases it is pure emotional dependency and fear of solitude that keep people trapped into an unhappy relationship. For unhappy marriages, very often children and property are an additional burden, too. Unhappy relationships can last for decades and being trapped into an unhappy relationship can lead to depression, alcoholism, and severe health problems. Basically, people who are trapped into an unhappy relationship have two options: to try to fix the relationship or to separate.
Try to Fix the Relationship
It is possible that loneliness is a temporary feeling and that the relationship can be repaired. For instance, if one of the partners is too busy with work or other activities, the other partner can feel neglected and lonely. In this case devoting more time to the neglected partner is an easy remedy.
But unfortunately, there are cases when relationship repair is not as easy as that. What is worse, sometimes the harder a couple tries to fix a relationship, the more it breaks. If there is no mutual desire to repair the relationship, then no miracles will work.
Consider Separation
The second option for dealing with the trap of an unhappy relationship is separation. If the relationship problems are deeper and they can't be fixed, then keeping the relationship alive is the same as slow agony. For such cases there is only one cure – separation. Separation is a chance to start a new life.
It is best if separation is the result of a mutual consent. However, it is possible that one of the partners (presumably the happy one) does not want to end the relationship because the status quo is convenient for him or her, so the unhappy partner might have to prepare for a fight to break free. In any case, staying trapped in an unhappy relationship is not a solution. Freedom and happiness come at a price and one must be prepared to pay it.
Tsveti Georgieva - I have been a full-time freelancer since 2005. Before that I was a serial job quitter and but now I have finally found a job - i.e. ...
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